ReBUILDing is a life skill we all need in the aftermath of unwanted and difficult changes. However, few of us understand how to do this in a healthy way. As businesses slowly reopen and you leave your home more often for work, errands and social gatherings you will need to adapt and create a new normal. You are not the same nor is the world around you.
When life as you knew it is gone, here is a five-step plan to help you begin ReBUILDing your life after Corona. It’s important to take these steps in the order given. You would not think of building a house without first creating a firm foundation. Likewise, it is essential that you begin to rebuild by choosing to grieve what no longer can be.
1. Choose to Grieve
I will face the painful emotions that come with loss.
As one coaching client said, “All these years I have kept myself so busy that I avoided grieving. I thought I was moving forward, but now I realize I’ve been lugging around a lot of losses and baggage. No wonder I was stuck.” Stay-at-home mandates provided the space she needed to emotionally heal.
Maybe you need to grieve what you lost recently. Is that your job? Anticipation of a summer vacation? Most of your retirement savings? Your sense of security? Choosing to grieve is a step you take by allowing yourself time to express the emotions you’re experiencing, such as sadness, anger, guilt or resentment. Whether you cry, journal, pray or vent to a close friend, you’ll be healthier when you accept and work through your feelings.
2. Reframe your Circumstances
I understand the importance of seeing my circumstances from a new perspective.
My friend and I were discussing how we get irritated too easily these days. She had been patiently waiting in line at a grocery store when someone pushed her way past my friend to the checkout stand without apologizing. The woman only said, “I’m in a hurry.”
My annoyed friend yelled after her, “And you don’t think I am, too?”
My friend was still feeling resentful hours later, but a quote from Ann Voskamp enabled her to shift her view of the experience: “Sometimes it helps in the moment to think: people aren’t being difficult—they are having difficulty.”[1]
3. Transform Your Pain
I recognize how I am becoming stronger, more empathic and courageous.
Don’t just go through this pandemic, but consider how can you grow in new ways. Maybe you are now more compassionate toward others who have lost their jobs. Or maybe you’ve learned how to pay closer attention to the way God is working in your life. Perhaps you’ve discovered an inner strength that you did not recognize before.
4. Risk Making Changes
I know that creating a new normal means facing my fears and stepping forward into the unknown.
Many people are saying they do not want to return to the hectic schedule they had before the pandemic. They’re learning to rest and enjoy the little pleasures in life. One friend asked me to pray that she has calendar wisdom as she chooses which activities she agrees to. Since she likes making people happy, it will be a huge risk to say no when something is not best for her. She will have to face the pain that someone is disappointed and upset with her.
5. Share Your Hope
I realize helping others gives purpose to my pain and hope to the brokenhearted.
At a time when so many are feeling hopeless, what stories, encouragement or experiences can you share with others to bring the hope of Christ into their dark world? The following story shows that no matter how bleak the circumstances we can still share the only hope any of us have.
“Back in 1980, Lori Persenaire lay in the hospital where she would soon pass away. She was only 20 years old, but cancer had ravaged her body. Still, Lori offered some encouraging advice for the patient on the other side of her room’s dividing curtain.
‘Lillian, I can’t see you, but I know you’re there,’ she said. ‘I don’t know if you
love the Lord, but you can get through this so much better if you do.’”[2]
ReBUILDing your life after Corona — just like ReBUILDing after Divorce — will not be something you do once and then you’re finished. For every significant setback, you begin anew. You grieve, reframe, transform, risk and share.
Warmly,
Georgia
P.S. – If you could use some help figuring out how to ReBUILD your life after Corona, let’s chat and see if 1-on-1 Life Coaching is right for you! To register for a complimentary discovery call that works with your schedule, click here.
