It’s the first month of the new year and maybe you’ve committed to losing a few pounds. But even the best intentions to eat well and exercise can be sabotaged by last year’s emotional trash. Emotional trash is any negative thoughts, feelings and attitudes such as petty grudges, long-held resentments, or destructive guilt. If not dealt with and removed, our emotional trash creates many problems. In fact, experts say avoiding, hiding, or soothing our feelings with food (emotional eating) is the main reason we fail to stick to our diets.
While your emotional trash might be different from mine, the truth is we all have it. I challenge you to not only shed that extra weight but those damaging emotions as well. Here’s three questions that help you become lighter and freer.
What am I ignoring that is weighing me down?
How often has someone made a hurtful comment that you brushed aside. “No big deal,” you tell yourself. “Don’t we all have times when someone hurts our feelings?”
Or maybe you’re disappointed in your performance at work or ashamed of your overreaction to a co-worker.
Choosing to ignore or hide these seemingly little hurts, disappointments or shame allows them to pile up and create more pain. Unfortunately this only increases our tendency to eat in order to soothe our emotions.
Whether you discouraged or disappointed, acknowledge your feelings and find ways of expressing them before they control you. Constructive outlets can include journaling, talking to a safe friend or counselor and going for a walk.
What have I grown use to that is weighing me down?
It’s a subtle, gradual process where one day you’re aware you’re holding onto a grudge but then slowly over time this resentment becomes so much a part of you that you don’t even know it is there. Like living near a fast food restaurant at first you’re aware of all the smells but after awhile you don’t even know they exist.
Forgiveness is a choice we make, not a feeling, and a process we work through. Once you choose to let go of any bitterness, be willing to face, work through and resolve your sadness, anger or betrayal in order to heal on a deeper level.
What am I blinded to that is weighing me down?
We all have blind spots – which is our inability to see things as they really are. The best way to see our own junk is through prayer and time for personal reflection. Another way to see what you can’t see is to seek the advice of godly people who share your values and you’ve learned to trust. Many times these people can help you identify the lies, hurts and pains you unknowingly still carry from the past?
Just like the extra pounds that we manage to deny until our jeans become impossible to get on, we often ignore or discount our emotional trash. So as you take stock of your life and are committed to making a fresh start this January, I encourage you to not only get rid of those extra pounds, but dump that weighty emotional trash.
