“A time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance.” Ecclesiastes 3:4 NIV
I suffered a huge disappointment recently, and as usual I began comparing my hurt and pain to that of my friends. A child who died. A husband who faced a terminal illness. A mother who struggled to meet the daily needs of her severely disabled son.
And I did what I normally do. I beat myself up for feeling sad at all. Look at what they’re dealing with. You have it easy compared to them. What right do you have to feel sad? You have so much to be grateful for.
While I did have much to be grateful for, I also had something real to feel sad about. Comparing my losses to others’ didn’t help me process the emotional pain I experienced.
“Oh well,” I told a friend, “it could be much worse.”
“Yes, it could be worse,” she said, “but remember what you told me after my husband died? I was afraid I was complaining about my circumstances too much, and you reminded me that my pain was my pain. It was OK to feel bad. Acknowledging the hurt was the only way I could get to the place of accepting what had happened.”
Light bulb moment. My pain was my pain, and it was real. I wasn’t to wallow in it, of course, but I needed to acknowledge it, process it, come to terms with it, and talk to the Lord about it. And that is what I did. I allowed myself to experience the sadness until finally I reached a place of acceptance.
Reflection for Gaining More:
Dear Jesus, help each one of us to face the disappointments and realities of our lives without staying stuck in them.
Where can I get the book ‘When A Girl is Given A Giant by Karen Porter?
Linda, it is available on amazon and all online stores. You can also enter the free giveaway in my latest newsletter which the deadline is by August 6. It just didn’t list that you need to send name and address to diane@georgiashaffer.com.